Friday, September 2, 2011

The Bagel

From my vantage point, I thought I saw the Goodyear blimp moving below me. This was not nosebleed territory, this was the oxygen deprived zone. Were those figures moving about on the surface of the earth men or women? And were they running back and forth for any particular purpose? Welcome to the upper deck at Arthur Ashe Stadium.

For a face price of $55 (thanks to the magician formerly known as Richie, my cost was less than half that amount) I got to witness, well almost, the first ranked woman, and then the man of similar station, mutilate and decimate the poor souls who served as sacrificial lambs for the evening. Mock cheers erupted on the winning of a single point by the overwhelmed and a "deuce" game brought a surge in energy to those starving for David to at least irritate Goliath.

Most of the evening was spent in idle chatter or endless review of the Yankee- Boston game on my phone (do I still call it a phone?). Like so many others, I entered into discussions about when it would be politically correct to vacate the premises: "If he (whoever that decidedly faceless person was) wins a game before it is 4-0 we will stay". At 4-0 in the second set, after a bagel (with everything on it) in the opening act of this play, we exchanged knowing glances and began our descent from the heavens.

Early round matches from these seats should come with a disclaimer: "This is not an exhibition, even though it may appear to be one. While results are not guaranteed, you should bet on the favorite if you want to make back the money on your overpriced ticket".

As we left, we headed towards the car, parked not near the tennis facility, but rather in the parking lot of Citi Field. Screams of approval could be heard. The voice on the loudspeaker announced that the Mets had bases loaded, one out, and the infield was playing in. I wondered if my ticket was exchangeable for a seat somewhere at the game. When a meaningless September encounter of a team I don't follow seems like an upgrade, I know the evening's entertainment was less than great viewing. If I actually could have seen it.


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