Tuesday, August 28, 2012

A Letter of Explanation from David Brooks to Mitt Romney

Dear Mr. Romney,

I wanted to explain the rationale behind "The Real Romney". Your recent "birther" comment to your home crowd in Michigan (as opposed to your home crowd in Massachusetts, New Hampshire, California and Utah) not only made those in attendance smile, but showed you to be the master of the one liner. Why not inject some levity into this campaign after months of grueling  debates with the likes of Cain, Bachmann and other intellectual heavyweights?

Do I actually believe those acerbic comments I made about your political and personal shortcomings? How could I, for you have shown yourself throughout this process to be nothing short of an open book about your taxes, religion, business and governing. You have hidden nothing, except maybe anything to do even remotely with virtually any part of your life. And the fact that you have moved further and further to the right, abandoning principles you once espoused, only demonstrates to me that you are capable of evolution (or maybe I shouldn't use that word).

I await, with almost breathless anticipation, your speech later this week. I know that God is a Republican and that he has the good sense to spare Tampa from this storm, so your remarks will not be diminished by distractions (well maybe there will a levee or two in danger of breach in New Orleans, but I am certain the Federal government is fully capable of dealing with this, at least until you decimate it during your time in office).

So please don't take my words the wrong way like the thin-skinned Democrats did about your insinuation concerning the "foreign" President. Thanks for understanding. You are da bomb.

Your fellow Republican comedian,

David Brooks


Anonymous said...

we read the column by Brooks today, and both of us had to go back to check who was the author. We thought that the Times used Brooks name instead of Dowd.
Now he has us confused ! Is he a right wing or left wing, or is he just confused as is Mitt.

Anonymous said...

My sentiments exactly.