Saturday, December 17, 2016

In Search of a Missing L - The Lost Rules of Spelling (Speling)

I am in search of a missing L.  I know it is around here somewhere, I just can't seem to locate it.
What happened to all those double consonants that have disappeared (soon it may read: what hapened to al those double consonants that have disapeared)?  I was recently reading an article that discussed (discused) the "skilful" rider. Was the other L left by the roadside, victim of a hit and run driver?
Are we shedding (sheding) letters (leters) to save time? Are we abandoning duplication? Are we worried (woried) about our 140 character limit?
What class (clas) must I take to learn the new rules? When is doubling up still permissible (permisible)?  Will we soon do away with bunk beds and twin mattresses (matreses)? We have lost double features at the movies and we now even have split doubleheaders in baseball (basebal).

It is all (al) a little (litle) too confusing. If you see, I have not, to this point, included the double vowel in this lament for it does appear (apear) at the moment to be a bridge too (to) far. But what if even that bridge disappeared (disapeared)?
Are we now to abandon double negatives (no, not that one), discard double entendres and do away with that dastardly double cross (double cros)? Can we no longer double down or double up? Are we done doubling our pleasure, doubling our fun?
And what about two for one bargains? And will (wil) one no longer be the loneliest number but two? 
I long for simpler times with simpler rules. When we knew to cross (cros) the street (stret) looking (loking) both ways. When night followed (folowed) day, seven hadn't eaten nine and i followed e, except after c.
Now it is all (al) a mess (mes). And I can only hope a skilful rider can navigate the terrain (terain) successfully (sucesfuly) and arrive (arive) home to sip a double (single) latte (late) before it is too (to) late (latte), oops (ops).


Anonymous said...



Anonymous said...

Where do you come up with this stuff?

Anonymous said...

Eh. Seems like an utter waste of a blog post to me.

Robert said...

Speaking of spelling errors, you might well be more drawn to reading the "unpresidented"tweets of Mr. Trump.