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Saturday, September 16, 2017

The Big BANG Theory or Good Will Hunting

AN EDITED VERSION OF THIS POST IS SCHEDULED TO APPEAR IN THE RECORD, A BERGEN COUNTY NEWSPAPER

("Congress Goes for Its Guns")

Single payer health care? A non-starter. Environmental regulations with a thought of saving the planet from imploding? Forget about it.  Financial reforms to protect our economy from another meltdown? Who are you kidding. Taking away any vestige of control from gun control? Now you're talking!!

If it is a slow day in Congress, there is always another way to kill time by making killing easier and more fun. 

Tax protection for the middle class? Too taxing. Addressing the rights of voters to actually vote? Not really. Taking Mr. Trump's finger off the nuclear button? Stopping the decimation of Roe v Wade? Undoing the Citizen's United debacle? Showing compassion for the oppressed and beleaguered? Stop bothering me!!!

But please be sure to tell all those from Columbine to Sandy Hook, from Gabby Giffords to tomorrow's Gabby Giffords that our legislators are busy saving the hearing of those with a weapon of permanent destruction in their hand, that there is nothing so important as being a nation that carries an unholstered big stick, that extending the unintended consequences of the Second Amendment seems our infinite national obsession.

They should entitle this bill "The Big BANG Theory"or alternatively, "Good Will Hunting."

And, as to that portion of the legislation directed at permitting the importing of 41 dead polar bears (for intended display), it must be said that this is a gross extension of that which was penned by our forefathers, who wrote only of our right to bear arms.

When discussing this most critical work of Congress, I implore you to speak softly so you don't do any damage to the sensitive eardrums of our most beloved hunters. 

Thanks for understanding.

2 comments:

harvey leeds said...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEWwZNUafKo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3kQlzOi27M

Anonymous said...

Winner!

JC