Thursday, November 23, 2017

On My Mom's Return for Thanksgiving

Yesterday's e-mail from JD Powers to Dorothy Nussbaum:

"Tell us what you think about your recent meeting with Becker Funeral Home"

Here is how I would like to reply:

Thank you so much for your inquiry. A critical aspect of any business is following up with potential clients. Unfortunately, my mother declines your invitation to respond.

Well, declines is probably not the correct word. Declines would connote a choice, a decision not to do something that one could do if they so wished. And sadly for Dorothy Nussbaum that is not a possibility.

You see, my mom passed away on March 25 of this year. And unless there is something you want to tell me, she has remained dead ever since that date.

Maybe I take "recent" too literally. Maybe you merely meant "once" as in sometime in the last 100 years. And if that was your actual intention with your words, then maybe your email was not wrong, merely too late. 

My mom survived to 99, but couldn't hang on to January 8, 2018 to crack the century mark. And thus, maybe your correspondence was but wishful thinking.

Today is the first Thanksgiving without her and so she has been particularly present in my thoughts in recent days. And maybe all you meant to accomplish in your email was to return the recently departed back into my life for one more chuckle.

And if that was your mission, you were wildly successful.

I give thanks on this day for many things. I can now add your "erroneous" solicitation to the list. It brought a smile to my face and my mom into my heart.

I wish you and all your family, living and dead, a most happy holiday.


Anonymous said...



Anonymous said...

OK, that was funny. And, as expected, your reply was priceless.


Anonymous said...

Hope you pressed Send


Sacco said...


Anonymous said...

Oh my god, that IS so funny.