Thursday, December 5, 2019

The Republican Response To Donald Trump Shooting Someone in Broad Daylight in Times Square

If there is one lesson to be learned from these impeachment proceedings it is that Donald Trump could do virtually anything and still be defended by the Republicans in Congress.

Just imagine the rhetoric if, as Mr. Trump once suggested, he shot someone in broad daylight in Times Square. Here are some of the responses one could expect from those within his party who swear to uphold and defend the Constitution of the United States.

"This is a clear case of protected free speech. A first amendment right to express his displeasure in any manner he deems appropriate. It is not like he shouted "Fire" in a theater."

"Look at it like a slip of the tongue, except with a gun. He thought he was shooting off his mouth but it was his finger."

"After all the wrongs he has committed, you decide that THIS is worthy of prosecution. He has done many worse things before, so leave the poor guy alone."

"People don't kill, guns do. And Donald Trump is not a gun. He is a loose cannon."

"If you had to deal with Mike Pence every day you would need to blow off some steam too."

"The guy ran in front of the bullet. I would charge him, if he survives with assault on the President's reputation."

"Ukraine was behind this vicious attack on our democracy."

"This was nothing but a blatant ploy by the Democrats to undo the 2016 election."

"It was Michael Cohen who pulled the trigger."

"It was Rudy Guiliani who pulled the trigger."

"This is less than a year from the election. The President can't commit murder now. The people cannot be deprived of their right to re-elect Donald Trump.The Democrats are the ones to blame here."

"It was Trudeau, with his wisecracks about the President, who is the real culprit."

"It was Hillary. Lock her up."

"The victim was an illegal immigrant. Case closed."

"If global warming is a hoax, just imagine what this is."

"If the President can kill our reputation that we have built over 250 years, what is the harm in shooting just one person? The President should be applauded for being able to scale down the damage he is capable of doing."

"Mr. Trump may be a weapon of mass destruction but he is not a killer."

"It was Dick Cheney who pulled the trigger."

As for Mr. Trump, he promised to provide his sworn deposition to Congress on this incident in the immediate future. Right after he releases his tax returns. And puts all his holdings in a blind trust. And announces that he lost the popular vote, fair and square, to Hillary. And admits that he is a covert agent working for the Russians.


Anonymous said...

Priceless! and so funny, despite the fact that it's too close to reality--RE

Anonymous said...

How do you cook up all this stuff I can not figure out. Are you the guy who writes all the Chinese menus?


Anonymous said...

Nice! So true!