Saturday, February 8, 2020

Words That Rhyme With Impeachment

It was around four minutes into the Republican defense in the Senate of Donald J Trump that my mind began to wander into areas dark as night. This was before the Dershowitz comedy hour, and least in my mind's eye I see it in that order, whether or not that is so. And thus, to stop from becoming a porcupine, or maybe a whistle blower, I had to find a way to distract myself. 

First I tried to find as many words as I could, of at least four letters, from the word impeachment. I headed directly to each peach. Which got me started thinking about "each peach pear plum, I spy Tom Thumb."  Which led me to thinking about my granddaughter. Which is a very fine thing to think about.

Next I decided to study the derivation of the word impeachment. I think it is French, from Latin and has something to do with stopping a foot, if I am able to comprehend adequately. Notice I did not write "to adequately comprehend" as I still believe it improper to split an infinitive.

This brought me to a consideration of English as it was taught to me back in the days when a dollar was a dollar and I believed you were old if you were 39. Anyway, we had to study trees, not those outside but the ones that helped us differentiate adverbs from adjectives and Republicans from house plants.

But all of this only got me a few more minutes into the argument as to why the crown on the President's head did not mean he could eat pizza with a knife and fork. And thus I began the search for words that rhyme with impeachment.

All I could locate was multi word phrases that nearly rhyme. Composed of two, three or four words lumped together in clear violation of my intent, Revere Beach, Berlin Speech, violin piece all ring hollow. Which made me think of Sleepy Hollow and headless horsemen, the four horsemen, Notre Dame and Rudy. Which was a pretty good movie, at least as sports movies go.

But speaking of Rudy, how is it that Mr. Guiliani is not yet under indictment in the Southern District of New York? Which would be pretty ironic don't you think? Of course you do, so why in the name of everything sane am I writing down these words rather than being forced at gunpoint, thanks to the Second Amendment, to listen to one second more of someone saying something that sounds like English but can't be because it makes absolutely no sense if it means that Donald J. Trump did not do what he did?

That might have been the longest sentence I ever wrote and speaking of long sentences I wish they would "lock him up" and throw away the key.

But I know such thinking is not productive for the health of my soul and so I turn again to positive thoughts of each peach and children's books and my granddaughter. 

Which is a very good thing.

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